Authored By Michael M. Michaelson

© July 2002

To Wipe Or Not To Wipe

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What...., what is this? It began in the 17th century when England sent its ambassador's to establish both financial and diplomatic ties to the great Ottoman Empire.  This long gone realm once ruled a great portion of the earth, stretching its rule out in all directions; from Turkey as far as Africa, India and into the western portions of Europe.


Through the passing centuries this Moslem Empire was ruled over by many powerful Sultans and it was a very rich and powerful kingdom. The roots of this empire dated back hundreds of years, to the time of wondering tribes and individual sects of nomads, eventually being united into one secular body by Mohammed. Consistent with all other earthly nations and empires, the Ottoman Empire was also made up of many different peoples. Each of these non conforming tribes brought with them into the empire all their many acquired practices and traditions, forging a very diverse and complex Empire.


These nomads were considered to be heathen by the western powers, for they lived a nomadic life, and when they did settle they were crude by the standards of western culture. But on the other hand, the diverse tribes also considered the western cultures to be heathen in nature and unsavory in character.


One of the many controversies that arose among this vast empire came about when western influence began to encroach into the Islamic way of life. This became obvious when the western culture began to introduce to its counter part the use of "TOILET PAPER," yes I said "TOILET PAPER!" 


The common practice among the Mohammedan's and nearly every eastern person was to, and still is, to wipe themselves with their left hands, using sand

or dirt whenever possible. Due to this practice, this "manner" became a natural part of life, and among the Mohammedan nations the left hand gained its importance in their society.   Regardless of western thought, the use of the left hand carries a strong discipline with it, even unto this very day.


One of the logical outcomes of this practice was that all Mohammedan's would only eat with the right hand, knowing what the left hand is used for.  And if you were ever to break this tradition, you would soon find yourself rejected and an outcast and the reason for this is not difficult to understand. 


For one of the severe Islamic punishments is to cut off the right hand, thereby rendering that individual a permanent outcast, because he can no longer eat with family or friends!


Now came western culture onto the eastern scene, carrying with them all their many articles of a so called "advanced society," and sure enough, toilet paper immediately became a controversy among all Islam. "Who were these western heathen dogs, opposing Ala, and His will," was the cry among the eastern masses.


Sure enough, soon it was considered a great sin to use toilet paper too, well, clean ones self after a natural body function. By using toilet paper, the privy user then had the privilege to use the left hand to eat or serve with, which immediately identified and marked this person as a Godless heathen.  Over the years, Toilet Paper slowly found its way into the Islamic culture and along with its use came division! This division still prevails this very day, and the breaking of this tradition still carries with it a heathen connotation!


Western society might think this to be very silly, but it is something very serious to a very powerful and very large group of religious people, even unto this very day! 


There is no doubt, that Tradition plays a very strong role in all religious Perceptions, and often divides its so called followers into many factions. Sometimes these factions will kill each other over their Traditions, yes, even over Toilet Paper!


May you "Wipe or Not Wipe" with paper, sand or leaves,  a particular way or not at all,  remember how easy it is to become a heathen in the eyes of others! In fact, if paper is your way, you're a heathen right now, judged by Millions and maybe Billions!


"What a tissue to be judged on?"



Contact Author at:

michael@ticktalk.net

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