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My sister, a woman of great self importance came from South Africa to visit me and my new wife and family in America. My step sister with a cousin of mine apparently harbored some resentment towards my new wife, thinking that I had married below my level and outside of my potential, and in their direct way, let their feelings be known. As I stood by, these self indulging guests continuously criticized their new relative with every sort of indiscretion. From her clothes to her decorative styles, there was no let up from these visiting guest of woes and I was only glad that their visit was short! My guest sister and cousin took every occasion to slyly ridicule our home, our country, our family, our education and of course my wife's culinary skills did not escape their rude comments. I kept my distance, knowing that this ordeal would soon end and I didn't want it to end in disaster, so bit my tongue more than once. With love and extraordinary patients my lovely wife kept her cool, watched her attitude and endured the jabs and the ignorant non committal attitude of her husband who seemed to be a total idiot in not being able to defend his wife against the rudeness of his uppity sister. I tried explaining to my wife that I personally didn't want to turn our one and only visit into a family battle so left well enough alone. But knew that my wife was no push over and was wondering why she had allowed this situation to go on so long. Finally, the last afternoon came and my wife knew that within a few hours her not so wonderful sister in law and distant cousin would be sitting through a twelve hour non stop plane flight headed home to her many stylish friends and her self important life. So my lovely wife, who had so patiently endured a weeks worth of terrible uncalled for insults worked hard to send her favorite new sister in-law and my cousin away with a special meal and I mean a really SPECIAL MEAL! With all her skills and with great care she prepared a most delicious, but at the same time a most memorable and incredible feast! A wonderful special, rich tangy "Chili Bean Delight" with all the tangy, tasty, hot, burning, peppery, spicy trimmings and each dish was filled to over flowing with the most gassy ingredients known to science and to the human body. I was wondering why my lovely quiet wife would so lavishly and painstakingly prepare such a meal. Because she normally wouldn't even prepare this extraordinary stomach churning food, described and better known as Mexican "Rocket Propellant" to her own family, unless we are planning to stay home for at least two days! But that was just the beginning, she also prepared her sister in laws favorite thick rich deep chocolate moose pie. This sounds really good doesn't it? Hey, no problem for anyone who was going to be staying at home for two days near to or locked into the bathroom! What actually do I mean here? Well, to top off this final goodbye dinner There was one other ingredient she added to her tormentors favorite final desert…a good supply of X-Intestinal Scrub! Of course she somehow forgot to warn me not to eat three helpings! My lovely and patient wife figures the reason we have never heard a word from my haughty sister and distant cousin is that they must have suffered from some terrible self humbling episode once air born and half way across the Atlantic Ocean! Surely, they had to be enjoying all the after effects of such a delightful meal…locked into their FIRST CLASS RESTROOMS! "Oh well," she explained to me later, "Long trips often take a toll on ones system and on family relationships…RIGHT DEAR?" I rubbed my tender stomach and nodded compliantly, all without the least disagreement! Moral: Never eat from the hand you have bitten, over and over! …And, for those husbands who remain silent to insults against their wives, he or they, also must endure the wrath of a meal that could keep him home from work one full day! Contact Author at: |
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The Fisherman's Ultimate Guide-Book * The Outdoor People's Handbook of Humor and Wit! * Designed to Assist All Humans Survive Their Personal Experiences in Nature…With a SMILE! No, absolutely not, you won't find anything like this anywhere else! A super, one of the kind masterpiece of wit and humor for everyone who loves to breathe! A real and fitting collection of just about everything to fit into your tent, your back-pack, your boat, Your office, your tackle box, your RV, onto your camper dash and a special gift for the game warden when he catches you! All This… and a Personal Phonebook Too! Read all about it in our Book Box! If you or your friends are Interested in Excellent Quality Entertainment and Great Stories, first Place TickTalk Publishing into your FAVORITES! Then go to our Home Page and simply type in your Email address and The TickTalk Publishers will be sure to include you in their Story Net-Working mailings. As a subscriber You will receive from the TickTalk collections, a variety of Quality Stories and other unique works of Insight and Challenge! Nothing is required other than you have an E-mail address and you might want to receive a variety of unusual stories that might bring an insight or touching thought into your life or family. Most of our stories have never been published and are searching for a Publisher, know any? Thank You |
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Vengeance is hers! |
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Authored By Michael M. Michaelson © June 2002 |